Is all theft robbery?

Fri.05.12.08. Even though deep inertia has descended on to Westmead I do not feel too dismal. The reality that there will be ‘shut down’, so reminiscent of ‘Mad John’ throughout December, comes as no surprise. If I could step back I should be able to accept the situation more easily. The weather is dreadful, the mood gloomy, the cash in short supply. A breather over the next few months should be welcomed, greeted almost with a sigh of relief instead of frustration.

Andy Lewis often recalls his priceless anecdote about Cockney Mick. When, after a particularly boastful night everyone was left in no doubt that if we had an elephant Mick would have box to put it in. This evening at the Oak I had made this possible by building a small construction to house a plastic pachyderm. It was a source of amusement, particularly for Andy, Chris and Knocker as well as the gathered group who recognised the wheeze immediately. A hook in the Roy Castle corner was the perfect place to display the exhibit. It is perhaps fortunate the Doc accompanied by Mick have ‘taken to the road’ for the week in search of home grown food, localised beers and beds for the night. They were due back today but the severe weather has meant that they are stranded in Penrith seeking additional accommodation. Their first stop of the journey was Whitby where they planned to purchase a box of their famous smoked kippers. Bought on Wednesday morning, stored in the car for four days, I am not sure that I will partake of a pair on their return. Earlier that evening Andy had taken his son to Orrell country park to acquire their Christmas tree. Young Sam kept look out whilst Andy chopped off the top of a conifer with his chainsaw. It was strapped to the back of his truck just like an illegally poached deer. I remember when I was a lad when my own father took me to some repossessed house to liberate a discarded fridge: something clearly that had been left unwanted conveniently superfluous. This is the ultimate moral dilemma. Can robbery of any kind be justified, what message does it send out to the child, was ‘Fagin’ simply a careers training officer for London borough council, Robin of Loxley the benefactor of other forest dwellers, maybe Mugabe is just borrowing Zimbabwe for a little while whilst he strips the country clean? Albeit, Andy summed up his actions by quoting that ‘any tree’ is part of the ‘world’s treasury’ and as such belongs to no one but to everyone. “All property is theft”, spake Andy, the ‘fat’ property developer as he left the group, taking the tree home to decorate it this evening with ‘baubles’, no doubt liberated from Tesco.

Thankfully ‘big rough Andy’ was not around when a collection of pre-Christmas revellers had stolen Lowie’s cap that was hanging up in the corner. Upon realising what had happened John shot out of the pub chasing them down Standish gate to retrieve his property. Knocker also gave chase whilst I ambled behind. I wanted to display a certain amount of support but was also hoping that the confrontation would not lead to punches being thrown, if so, the fracas would definitely be over by the time I arrived on the scene. Luckily, there wasn’t a hint of an argument the stolen trophy was returned without fuss. Chris and the Preacher had sensibly chosen  not to assist so when we returned triumphant Lowtie questioned their noticeable indifference to his plight, to which Chris replied “If you think that I am going to get my head kicked in for a friggin’ flat cap, you are dafter than I thought!”

It has been a night of conflicting principles, Andy on the one hand showing his child the way to rob from the rich without one jot of guilt whilst Lowtie has stood up for his honour tackling a dozen drunken very large blokes to rescue a twenty year old flat cap.